Creeping Toward Xmas

T'was the Internet Night Before Christmas

by Author Unknown

T’was the night before Christmas, when all through the Net,

There were hacker's a surfing. Nerds? Yeah, you bet.

The e-mails were stacked by the modem with care,

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.

The newbies were nestled all snug by their screens,

While visions of Java danced in their dreams.

My wife on the sofa and me with a snack,

We just settled down at my rig (it's a Mac).

When out in the Web there arose such a clatter,

I jumped to the site to see what was the matter.

To a new page my Mac flew like a flash,

Then made a slight gurgle. It started to crash!!

I gasped at the thought and started to grouse,

Then turned my head sideways and clicked on my mouse.

When what to my wondering eyes should appear?

My Mac jumped to a page that wasn't quite clear.

When the image resolved, so bright and so quick,

I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick!

More rapid than mainframes, more graphics they came,

Then Nick glanced toward my screen, my Mac called them by name;

"Now Compaq! Now Acer!", my speaker did reel;

"On Apple! On Gateway!" Santa started to squeal!

"Jump onto the circuits! And into the chip!

Now speed it up! Speed it up! Make this thing hip!"

The screen gave a flicker, he was into my "Ram",

Then into my room rose a full hologram!

He was dressed in all red, from his head to his shoes,

Which were black (the white socks he really should lose).

He pulled out some discs he had stored in his backpack.

Santa looked like a dude who was rarin' to hack!

His eyes, how they twinkled! His glasses, how techno!

This ain't the same Santa that I used to know!

With a wink of his eye and a nod of his head,

Santa soon let me know I had nothing to dread.

He spoke not a word, gave my Mac a quick poke,

And accessed my C drive with only a stroke.

He defragged my hard drive, and added a "Dimm",

Then threw in some cool games, just on a whim!

He worked without noise, his fingers they flew!

He distorted some pictures with Kai's Power Goo!

He updated Office, Excel and Quicken,

Then added a screensaver with a red clucking chicken!

My eyes widened a bit, my mouth stood agape,

As he added the latest version of Netscape.

The drive gave a whirl, as if it were pleased,

St. Nick coyly smiled, the computer appeased.

Then placing his finger on the bridge of his nose,

Santa turned into nothing but ones and zeros!

He flew back into my screen and through my uplink,

Back into the net with barely a blink.

But I heard his sweet voice as he flew from my sight,

"Happy surfing to all, and to all a good byte!" 

TODAY'S SEEDS OF WISDOM

• JUST BLOOMED TODAY  
• AWKWARD VISIT WITH SANTA PHOTO OF THE DAY
• HIDEOUS CHRISTMAS SWEATER PHOTO OF THE DAY
• HOLIDAY PHOTO OF THE DAY
• TWEET TREATS
• DID YOU KNOW...?
• DOG CONFESSIONS
• BIZARRE CHRISTMAS CARDS
• LETTERS TO SANTA
• PHOTOBOMBING
• GARDEN UPDATE
• 12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS
• FAUNA
• GARDEN GIGGLE
• WHAT IN THE WORLD?  
• FEEDBACK

JUST BLOOMED TODAY 

AWKWARD VISIT WITH SANTA PHOTO OF THE DAY 

HIDEOUS CHRISTMAS SWEATER PHOTO OF THE DAY

HOLIDAY ANIMAL PHOTO OF THE DAY

TWEET TREATS

bringing you the quirky, funniest and most interesting tweets from Twitter that we came across.  

For all we know, Bigfoot might only need, like, a size 7 shoe.@EvanJKessler 

DID YOU KNOW...?
Christmas was not declared an official holiday in the United States until June 26, 1870.
DOG CONFESSIONS

BIZARRE CHRISTMAS CARDS

LETTERS TO SANTA
Dear Santa: I wave to you in the mall every time I go. Take care, and remember how much I enjoyed the Christmas I was 8 years old? I had a jumping/screaming fit yelling, "Santa spoils me!" It was a lot of fun. Toodle-oo
- Megan, 16, San Marcos, California.

My brother got your letter from the post office but I didn't so I thought I would email you instead!
- Edele, 10, Killarney, Ireland.

Do you know Tim Allen?
- David, 8, Lancaster, Texas.

Can you pick me up some chocolate when you're in Belgium?
- Christopher, 8, Brighton, United Kingdom.

You email back so fast that I can tell youre magic!
- Brendan, 7, Carlisle, United Kingdom.

merry christmas and happy new year I would like to see you but i know very difficult. You are very good man because you love all the children of the word.
- Artemis, 8, Athens, Greece.

Please make sure the reindeers eat all their carrots, tops too! becauase their veggies are good for them!
- Tara, 5, Hartselle, Alabama.

I love Santa cause he gives me presants and I love him and I trust him. I love Santa too much.
- LeAndra, 7, Bloomfield, New Mexico.
 

GARDEN UPDATE
Still cold, biting cold. Sun tried to come out for a wee bit today, but gave up.
12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS

ON THE THIRD DAY OF CHRISTMAS, your true love gave to you - three French hens......two turtle doves, and a partridge in a pear tree.

The French hens were not available, so how about some chicken noodle soup, compliments of the three French hens.

PHOTOBOMBING

   

GARDEN GIGGLE

FAUNA

If my friends could see me meow...

WHAT IN THE WORLD?  

On today in American history, people in gardens everywhere were talking about:
1773 Boston Tea Party
1944 Battle of the Bulge, deadliest conflict of WWII
1950 Truman declares state of emergency
1979 OPEC states raise oil prices
1998 Clinton orders air attack on Iraq
2000 Bush nominates Colin Powell Secretary of State
2010 "Larry King Live" ends after 25 years on CNN
2012 Hillary Clinton faints and sustains concussion

FEEDBACK

 

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